Luke 17:3 Ministries Inc
Wednesday, March 29, 2017
For Adult Daughters of Controlling or Abusive Birth-Families
JULY 2013 Newsletter
LUKE 17:3 Ministries
for adult daughters
of controlling or abusive birth-families
A sisterhood for those who seek support in developing self-esteem, setting boundaries and limits, forgiveness, Godly confrontation, recognizing and cutting ties with reprobates, healing, and rejoicing in the peace and love of
the Lord, our Father
Take heed to yourselves. If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him……..Luke 17:3
VOLUME 11, ISSUE 2 JULY 2013
Luke 17: 3 is the scripture often misquoted, usually by an abuser or his enabler, when he tells you that the Bible says “Forgive and Forget”, or that you must forgive him because you are a Christian. However, Jesus is very specific when he tells us to rebuke the sinner, and if he repents, to forgive him. Have you rebuked your abuser, and has he or she repented?
THE ONLY FORM OF ABUSE STILL CONDONED BY SOCIETY. THE ONLY ABUSE IN WHICH THE VICTIM IS CRITICIZED OR ABANDONED FOR TRYING TO PROTECT HERSELF. CHILD ABUSE THAT DIDN’T END WHEN ADULTHOOD BEGAN…THE CONTINUING ABUSE OF GROWN CHILDREN BY THEIR PARENTS.
If you have ever experienced Adult Child Abuse by a parent, sibling, or other relative, We Welcome You!
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Rev. Renee Pittelli
Luke 17:3 Ministries, Inc.
P.O. Box 684
Chestertown, NY 12817
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Please ask about our Luke 17:3 Ministry in Tennessee, founded by Rev. Denise Rossignol.
Thank you Jesus!
THE “CHRISTIAN” ABUSER
TWISTING GOD’S WORD TO JUSTIFY ABUSE
By Rev. Renee
(continued from last issue)
THEIR FRUITS WILL GIVE THEM AWAY EVERY TIME
This abuser is a person who knows the “Born-Again Christian” drill well. She is able to display many of the outward signs of being a “good” Christian, and she uses her knowledge to get away with as much as possible, while trying to convince others that they must have misjudged her because she’s obviously so holy.
But this person cannot fool anyone who knows enough to look at her fruits. Her life, her house, and her finances are all in chaos. She wastes most of the day and night on the computer, instead of cleaning or doing anything constructive. She does not work. She has troubled relationships with almost every family member and very few friendships. She never follows through on plan after plan to change her life, get a job, move to a new house, start a ministry, or any of the other big ideas she carries on about. She is often upset or angry with everyone from her vet, to her hairdresser, to her church, to her children, and accuses almost everyone who crosses her path of not “doing right” by her in some way. She is unreasonable, narcissistic, and almost always worked up over something.
She is selfish and self-centered. She is spoiled, attention-seeking, and irrationally demanding of other people’s time and energy, without giving any
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All this is evidence that God’s judgment is right, and as a result you will be counted worthy of the kingdom of God, for which you are suffering. God is just: He will pay back trouble to those who trouble you and give relief to you who are troubled, and to us as well. This will happen when the Lord Jesus is revealed from heaven in blazing fire with his powerful angels. He will punish those who do not know God and do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. They will be punished with everlasting destruction and shut out from the presence of the Lord and from the majesty of his power on the day he comes to be glorified in his holy people and to be marveled at among all those who have believed. This includes you, because you believed our testimony to you…2Thessalonians 1:5-10 (NIV).
The fathers shall not be put to death for the children, neither shall the children be put to death for the fathers: every man shall be put to death for his own sin….Deuteronomy 24:16 (KJV).
thought to what anyone else might be going through. She has no concept of boundaries, or that she might be intruding on another person with her demands for attention. She is filled with pride. She is dishonest and untruthful. She never gets anything accomplished, and is envious of those who do. She is a drama-queen who treats every little thing in her life as if it was a huge catastrophe, and then ignores, or even contributes to, the REAL catastrophes in the lives of her friends. She has no appreciation. She has an unloving heart. She uses people when she needs them, but if they need her, she is nowhere to be found. She takes, but she does not give, and she does not serve.
If you are thinking that none of the above makes her sound like much of a “good” Christian, I would have to say you are right. But what this person fails to realize is that someone with discernment can see all of these things and will know her by her fruits. She thinks the phony façade she presents works with everyone. Using her “Christianity” as a cover-up for her sinful nature may not work all of the time or with every person, but it does work enough times and with enough people that it is worth it for her to continue doing. And so, whenever she is rebuked or challenged, trotting out her “Christianity” is her automatic response. Yet, to one with understanding, her fruits will give her away, and her true nature will be obvious. Here are four of her best excuses/ contradictions out of the 36 that she gave me, and what the Lord showed me about why they just don’t hold any water:
1. “THE LORD HAS HEALED ME, PRAISE THE LORD!”, FOLLOWED BY “I ACT THE WAY I DO BECAUSE OF MY PAST.”
This abuser made many statements to the effect that the Lord had healed her, the Lord had done or was doing a great work in her, and that her walk with Jesus was deepening every day. The point of these statements was to mislead the listener into believing that she was a mature Christian who walks with the Lord, and therefore could not possibly be capable of abusing others. Again, her defense was that everybody just “misunderstands” her.
But then she went on to blame her “abusive childhood”, forty years in the past, for her current “actions and reactions” toward her friend. This is a huge contradiction. One of this woman’s biggest problems is that she just doesn’t know enough to quit while she’s ahead. Part of the response the Lord gave me to this inconsistency was:
“People who have been healed by the Lord no longer act or react according to their histories. If the Lord has healed you, then the past no longer has any control over your life. That is what healing is. I know this from my own healing from my own abusive past. The lives of mature Christians are controlled by the Holy Spirit. When God heals you, he makes you a new person and puts a new spirit in you (Ezekiel 36:26-27). The past is ancient history and you are no longer influenced by it.
The Lord’s healing is perfect and complete. It is not imperfect or incomplete. He dries all our tears and fills us with his grace. The Lord knows the plans he has for you. He will turn the bad in your life to good. In my own case, his will was for my testimony and experiences to be used to help others. Once he has healed you, he certainly doesn’t intend for you to use your past to HURT others. We need to learn from the past, but if we still let it influence how we treat others in the present, or influence anything else in our lives, then we are not healed and we are not Spirit-filled.”
Another interesting observation is that this woman had been “saved” some 35 years previously, and yet she was JUST NOW “deepening her walk with the Lord”, “being healed” and “having a great work done in her”. This indicates someone who, although she has been a Christian for decades, had never become a MATURE Christian, and, as her continuing abusive behavior demonstrates, had never had her “second salvation”, or gone through the process of sanctification. Although she knew the right words to say, she did not really “dwell with God”. She was not being truthful. She was deceiving herself, and trying to deceive others as well. But her fruits gave her away.
When rebuked, this abuser had nothing to say in terms of repentance. But she did have a huge inventory of excuses, which she somehow felt justified her repeatedly hurting another person. One of the excuses she was now offering was her own abusive past. So another point which I needed to make in my discussions with her was that, concerning one’s “past”, or any other excuse, the fact is that the Bible does not tell us to “analyze” or “understand” the reasons why someone might be acting unacceptably. Scripturally, that is a non-issue. We tend to spend far too much time talking to therapists, reading books on why people behave badly, and in general trying to give abusers the benefit of the doubt and convince ourselves that they “can’t help it” and “don’t really mean it”.
But nowhere in Scripture are we told to “be understanding of” an abuser’s past, her abusive childhood, alcohol or drug addiction, oversensitivity, anger issues, stress, trauma, or any other reason she might think she has for hurtful words or behavior. No one has the right to inflict their issues on anyone else. We make it far more complicated than it is, but in the Bible it really couldn’t be any simpler. The only way the Bible instructs us, very clearly, to deal with an offender is to rebuke her, forgive if there is repentance, and have nothing to do with her if there is not. Nothing more, and nothing less.
2. “THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT!”
At one point in my ongoing discussion with this person, I mentioned that the Lord had revealed to me a demonic influence in what she was doing to her friend. I urged her to honestly and prayerfully search her heart so that she might recognize these things for herself and be delivered of them. What I saw were the spirits of envy, pride, jealousy, bitterness, and resentment. However, the Lord told me not to reveal them to her because she would not hear it coming from me. She needed to see it for herself, confess it, and repent of it.
But she did not prayerfully search her heart and wait on the Lord’s word. Instead, she guessed on her own that the “spirit of strife” was at work in her situation. She then went on to say that she believed this was “probably on both sides”, (like I said, she doesn’t know enough to quit while she’s ahead), when in reality, her friend had done nothing wrong at all, had actually been very patient for many months with her uncalled-for histrionics, and had been loving and forgiving toward her, only to be repaid again and again with nastiness, selfishness, lies, deceptions, and unreasonable demands. This abuser’s pride would not let her admit that the wrongdoing was really only on her side- there was no wrongdoing at all on the other side. She was 100% at fault, but she needed to feel that her ex-friend had contributed to the problem and shared in the guilt.
Upon hearing this, I realized I would need to be a little more specific. I then clarified my point- that she needed to discern how these spirits had influenced HER, NOT her friend, or their “situation”.
After giving some more thought to my words, this abuser managed to come up with yet another angle. This time, the idea was to absolve herself completely with the old “the devil made me do it”, or in her case, “the devil made US do it” defense.
One persistent theme in our ongoing discussions was that this person’s most frequent, and almost reflexive, response to someone letting her that know she had been hurtful was to accuse the other person of “attacking her” or “blaming her”. Apparently, since I was not agreeing with what she was doing to her friend, in her mind, both I and her friend had been “attacking” and “blaming” her. When I mentioned the demonic influence in her behavior, she jumped on it almost gleefully, quickly twisting what I had said to completely avoid taking any responsibility. She was very excited that we could finally agree on something! And in yet another attempt to make an ally out of someone who wasn’t buying what she was selling, she tried enlisting me to “stand together with her against the devil”, who, according to her, was now the ONLY ONE really causing “all of this”.
She began by telling me that she totally agreed that “there is a demonic force at work here. No doubt about it!” This was her attempt to sucker me into thinking she agreed with me and we were all seeing the same things. She then went on to inform me that it was the “spirit of strife”. Still “educating” me, she told me this is a demonic spirit sent out straight from hell for the express purpose to steal, kill and destroy. She asked if I could see that it had done just that.
And then she went on to say that here we three friends were “blaming each other” (Whoa! She certainly has nothing to “blame” anybody for! No one else but her did anything wrong!) and “anything and everything else”, instead of placing the blame right where it belongs! She repeated that she would “own what was hers”, but that it’s time we “attack the correct person!” Really on a roll, here, she continued that she wanted to stand up NOW against Satan and bind and rebuke him for what he did and was still trying to do in this situation. Her voice pitched with excitement as she declared, “We’ve let him go far enough!!! It’s time to stand together against him!!! Are you with me on this?”
My goodness, I felt like one of the Three Musketeers. Here was a real drama-queen at work, trying to sweep everybody else up in her performance. But in reality, this was just another diversionary tactic. The truth gets distorted and twisted. Like all narcissists, she does not differentiate between herself and others. She assumed we were all thinking alike, “blaming each other and anything and everything else”, when we most definitely were not.
Notice that she wanted me to be “with her on this”- ON THE SAME SIDE AS SHE WAS. On HER side instead of on the side of her victim- a verbal sleight of hand and a very subtle maneuver for a declaration of loyalty from me. One of Satan’s tricks is to try to get you to agree that some form of his evil is acceptable. So in situations like this, there really is no compromise and no aligning yourself with the wicked person. Wrong is wrong, plain and simple. The smokescreens and diversions that an abuser will throw at you are meant to confuse you and to help her avoid being accountable. Here is the response the Lord gave me to her defense of “the devil made her do it!”:
“First of all, I don’t agree that “blaming each other” is what is happening here. Every conflict cannot be referred to in terms of “blame”. That automatically makes the situation adversarial instead of cooperative, and accomplishes nothing toward resolution. I am not “blaming” you, and I’m certainly not “blaming anything and everything else”. Holding you accountable for what you do is not the same as “blaming” you. Also, I have not wronged you, and neither has our friend, so you don’t have anything to “blame” me for, or to blame her for, either. If your first or most common response when someone lets you know that you have hurt them is to feel as if you are being “blamed” or “attacked”, then you need to think about why you are so defensive.
I am also not “blaming” Satan and never meant to imply that. I do not agree that he has any power or control over my actions, because I am a child of God. Satan does not control me because I do not give Satan control. I give control only to the Lord. I said there was a demonic INFLUENCE, NOT demonic CONTROL. You still have free will. Satan can only tempt, but he cannot make you follow that temptation. Satan is not controlling this situation. It is an easy out for people to blame Satan in order to absolve themselves, at least partially, of the responsibility for what they’ve done wrong. But the devil doesn’t MAKE people do what they do. They have free choice to listen to him or not. Humans are ultimately accountable for their own choices and behavior, not Satan. YOU made the choice to act the way you did, over and over again, for all these months. No growth is ever possible if you are going to blame anyone or anything else for your own wrongdoing.”
3. “I HAVE REPENTED TO GOD FOR HURTING HER, AND MY CONSCIENCE IS NOW CLEAR.”
This is another ploy used by this abuser to avoid having to make amends directly to the person she hurt. She was basically saying that she only has to answer to God for harming someone, and that no one else has the right to “judge” her, or to expect her to make up for what she did or to change her behavior. She is letting us know that, in her mind, she does not have to show repentance to her victim because she has repented to God, and that’s the end of it! Her conscience is now clear! So let’s change the subject and move on!
She told me that she had indeed repented to God “for any and all of her part” in this situation, and that she now had “a very clear conscience”. But in the Bible, the apostle Paul writes, “MY CONSCIENCE IS CLEAR, BUT THAT DOES NOT MAKE ME INNOCENT. IT IS THE LORD WHO JUDGES ME”…..1 Corinthians 4:4 NIV.
Here we have a clear example of a “Christian” who is simply too prideful to face her victim, apologize sincerely, accept responsibility, admit she was wrong, and change her ways. She thinks she can now put it all behind her and hold her head up high without ever doing the right thing by her victim. Any humility this person had shown in the past was false humility, calculated again to make her seem more righteous than she was. It wasn’t until she was caught in this conflict over her wrongdoing that her pride- filled heart became obvious.
In the Bible, when you damage another person, you are expected to make restitution to that person. “Repenting to God” does not get you off the hook. You are told to go face the person you hurt and make it right by making him whole. And THEN you still have to repent to God for your sin. (Exodus 22:3-15; Leviticus 6:5-7; Numbers 5: 5-8; Proverbs 6: 2-5; Proverbs 6:31) The Bible does not tell us that “repenting to God” is sufficient, or that it absolves us of any obligation to repent directly to the person we injured.
Additionally, when this abuser implied that because she had “repented to God”, no one else had the right to judge her, she was conveniently forgetting that the children of God, one of which she claimed to be, are held to an even higher standard than the children of the world, and certainly than the children of the devil.
In Galatians chapter 5, Christians are instructed to expel an immoral brother from among them. Paul specifically tells us not to judge those OUTSIDE the church, but we ARE told to judge those INSIDE the church. I WROTE YOU IN MY LETTER NOT TO ASSOCIATE WITH IMMORAL PEOPLE; I DID NOT AT ALL MEAN WITH THE IMMORAL PEOPLE OF THIS WORLD, OR WITH THE COVETOUS AND SWINDLERS, OR WITH IDOLATERS, FOR THEN YOU WOULD HAVE TO GO OUT OF THE WORLD. BUT ACTUALLY, I WROTE TO YOU NOT TO ASSOCIATE WITH ANY SO-CALLED BROTHER IF HE IS AN IMMORAL PERSON, OR COVETOUS, OR AN IDOLATER, OR A REVILER, OR A DRUNKARD, OR A SWINDLER- NOT EVEN TO EAT WITH SUCH A ONE. FOR WHAT HAVE I TO DO WITH JUDGING OUTSIDERS? DO YOU NOT JUDGE THOSE WHO ARE WITHIN THE CHURCH? BUT THOSE WHO ARE OUTSIDE, GOD JUDGES. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES…..1 Corinthians 5: 9-13 NASB. In Deuteronomy, the children of God are told six times to purge wicked people from among themselves [Deuteronomy 17:7; 19:19; 21:21; 22:21 & 24; and 24:7). These are just a few of the Scriptures instructing us to hold fellow “children of God” accountable for their behavior.
Notice also the vague reference to “her part in all of this” without any mention of exactly WHAT that was. There was never anything specific in any of our discussions that she would admit to doing and agree to be accountable for. Also, by referring to “her” part, she was implying that the other person ALSO had a part in it, another attempt to divert attention away from HER wrongdoing and place at least part of the “blame” (as she would say) on the innocent victim. She tried this ploy several times. But whenever I asked her specifically what the victim had done wrong, she would either ignore me and not answer, babble something that made no sense or was completely untrue, or change the subject. The reality was that the victim had done absolutely NOTHING to contribute to the situation between them, or to deserve the treatment she got. The arrogant abuser was trying to keep her own dignity intact and save face by refusing to acknowledge that NO ONE ELSE did anything wrong!
Part of my response to her “clear conscience” was:
“It is great when someone repents to God, and I am very happy that you have done that. But repentance means a change in behavior and turning from wrongful ways, not just remorse. Besides God, the person you have injured has the right to a meaningful apology, a guarantee that it will never happen again, and whatever else you can possibly do to make amends. Once trust has been broken, and someone has learned to expect unacceptable or destructive behavior from another person, she would need reassurances and a promise of change before she would again be able to feel comfortable with the person who hurt her.
Apologies are a great first step, but they are only a first step. You have a history of apologizing whenever you make anybody mad at you, just to get back into their good graces. But you never change anything. You have even done this with me, several times. I also remember you apologizing last year after the way you were acting towards our friend. Although she wasn’t comfortable with it and the grudging way it had been given, she accepted your apology and thought you both had put it behind you, and that you then would be a loving and considerate friend. In fact, a number of things you now say to make it seem as if you have changed, such as the Lord is now doing a great work in you, you have also said to me, many times in the past. But then more of the same always happens in your behavior toward both me and our friend. So there have been several apologies over the years, but no actual change in your heart towards me or our friend. How can she know that anything will be different after this apology? Why should she believe you now?
Although there are times when you appear to be seeing clearly, gaining wisdom, or growing in the Lord, later on it turns out that you are not and nothing has actually changed. Your fruits are the clue. Not until you discern the spirits that are influencing you in your life, as well as in your feelings towards our friend, confess them, and are delivered of them will this happen.
When you refer in general terms to “your part in all of this”, or that you “will own what is yours”, without ever mentioning what exactly that is, there is nothing to indicate that you have actually been given any knowledge or understanding of these things from the Lord. It could just as easily be Satan trying to trick or deceive you, or me, or our friend.
Someone who has treated another poorly needs to be very specific about exactly what behaviors they now recognize are unacceptable and are committed to permanently changing. Generalities, “making an effort”, “growing”, or “trying” to change isn’t good enough. These are just ways to avoid making a definite and permanent commitment. In order for trust to be restored, there needs to be a promise that certain explicit things will simply never happen again. This is the kind of response our friend would need from you before she could feel that the Lord’s hand is truly on a restoration of your friendship, and that it is really he who is speaking to your heart, and his word that you are following.
Also, time needs to pass with the “repented” person proving that they meant what they said, not that they’re still “trying” weeks, months, or years later. There is much growth that still needs to happen and that is more important than anything else. If the Lord uses the end of your friendship to do this work in you, then it will be done according to his perfect will. Until your understanding is complete, you are fully accountable and commit to a permanent change, and a new heart and spirit is put in you, God will not bless a reconciliation.”
4. “I HAVE RECEIVED THE BAPTISM OF THE HOLY SPIRIT AS EVIDENCED BY SPEAKING IN TONGUES; THEREFORE, I AM A GODLY AND RIGHTEOUS PERSON.”
This person did not go into any details about how long ago she received this gift, whether she still speaks in tongues, or whether she prays in tongues or truly speaks in tongues. I have never heard her speak in tongues, and would have no way of knowing if she had a genuine gift, or if she was manifesting a counterfeit gift or speaking through the Spirit of False Tongues. She boasted of this gift and used it to imply that she was being “misjudged” by me and our friend, because if she was “holy” enough to have such a gift, then she could not have done what we all knew perfectly well she did. However, the Bible is clear that speaking in tongues does not necessarily equate to being a truly Godly, righteous Christian.
In 1 Corinthians, chapters 12-14, the apostle Paul goes into a very detailed account of the Gifts of the Holy Spirit, and discusses speaking in tongues at length. He tells us very clearly that not everyone will receive every gift, but that ALL the gifts are important in the body of the church. Some will be given the gift of tongues, some will be given the gift of prophecy, some will be given miraculous powers, some will be given wisdom, etc. The Holy Spirit gives these gifts to each person, just as he determines (1 Corinthians 12: 4-31)
Paul doesn’t pull any punches when he tells us that it doesn’t matter what gifts we have been given- if we do not have LOVE in our hearts, then we are nothing. In 1 Corinthians 13:1-3, he says, “THOUGH I SPEAK WITH THE TONGUES OF MEN AND OF ANGELS, BUT HAVE NOT LOVE, I HAVE BECOME SOUNDING BRASS OR A CLANGING CYMBAL. AND THOUGH I HAVE THE GIFT OF PROPHECY, AND UNDERSTAND ALL MYSTERIES AND ALL KNOWLEDGE, AND THOUGH I HAVE ALL FAITH, SO THAT I COULD REMOVE MOUNTAINS, BUT HAVE NOT LOVE, I AM NOTHING. AND THOUGH I BESTOW ALL MY GOODS TO FEED THE POOR, AND THOUGH I GIVE MY BODY TO BE BURNED, BUT HAVE NOT LOVE, IT PROFITS ME NOTHING.”…1 Corinthians 13:1-3 NKJV.
Paul then goes on to discuss the gift of tongues, and its desirability and value compared to the other gifts, especially the gift of prophecy: PURSUE LOVE, AND DESIRE SPIRITUAL GIFTS, BUT ESPECIALLY THAT YOU MAY PROPHESY. FOR HE WHO SPEAKS IN A TONGUE DOES NOT SPEAK TO MEN BUT TO GOD, FOR NO ONE UNDERSTANDS HIM; HOWEVER, IN THE SPIRIT HE SPEAKS MYSTERIES. BUT HE WHO PROPHESIES SPEAKS EDIFICATION AND EXHORTATION AND COMFORT TO MEN. HE WHO SPEAKS IN A TONGUE EDIFIES HIMSELF, BUT HE WHO PROPHESIES EDIFIES THE CHURCH. I WISH YOU ALL SPOKE WITH TONGUES, BUT EVEN MORE THAT YOU PROPHESIED; FOR HE WHO PROPHESIES IS GREATER THAN HE WHO SPEAKS WITH TONGUES, UNLESS INDEED HE INTERPRETS, SO THAT THE CHURCH MAY RECEIVE EDIFICATION…..1 Corinthians 14:1-5 NKJV.
THEREFORE LET HIM WHO SPEAKS IN A TONGUE PRAY THAT HE MAY INTERPRET. FOR IF I PRAY IN A TONGUE, MY SPIRIT PRAYS BUT MY UNDERSTANDING IS UNFRUITFUL….OTHERWISE, IF YOU BLESS WITH THE SPIRIT, HOW WILL HE WHO OCCUPIES THE PLACE OF THE UNINFORMED SAY “AMEN” AT YOUR GIVING OF THANKS, SINCE HE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU SAY?....1 Corinthians 14:13-14, 16 NKJV.
I THANK MY GOD I SPEAK WITH TONGUES MORE THAN YOU ALL; YET IN THE CHURCH I WOULD RATHER SPEAK FIVE WORDS WITH MY UNDERSTANDING, THAT I MAY TEACH OTHERS ALSO, THAN TEN THOUSAND WORDS IN A TONGUE. BRETHREN, DO NOT BE CHILDREN IN UNDERSTANDING; HOWEVER, IN MALICE BE BABES, BUT IN UNDERSTANDING BE MATURE…..1 Corinthians 14:18-20 NKJV.
THEREFORE TONGUES ARE FOR A SIGN, NOT TO THOSE WHO BELIEVE BUT TO UNBELIEVERS; BUT PROPHESYING IS NOT FOR UNBELIEVERS BUT FOR THOSE WHO BELIEVE. THEREFORE IF THE WHOLE CHURCH COMES TOGETHER IN ONE PLACE, AND ALL SPEAK WITH TONGUES, AND THERE COME IN THOSE WHO ARE UNINFORMED OR UNBELIEVERS, WILL THEY NOT SAY THAT YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR MIND? BUT IF ALL PROPHESY, AND AN UNBELIEVER OR AN UNINFORMED PERSON COMES IN, HE IS CONVINCED BY ALL, HE IS CONVICTED BY ALL. AND THUS THE SECRETS OF HIS HEART ARE REVEALED; AND SO, FALLING DOWN ON HIS FACE, HE WILL WORSHIP GOD AND REPORT THAT GOD IS TRULY AMONG YOU….1 Corinthians 14: 22-25 NKJV.
And so we are taught that not all Christians receive every gift, but that ALL of the gifts are important to the body of Christ. We see that, despite what this particular abuser apparently thinks, the Bible does not place such a high priority on tongues that it should be considered the true test of a believer. In fact, the gift of prophecy is assigned a much greater importance.
I’m not quite sure why she chose to “boast” about tongues in particular, and no other gifts, as some sort of proof that she should be considered a Godly person. (Probably because she had no other gifts to boast of). But in any case, the Scriptures are still very clear on the most important point of all- the gift of tongues, or any other gifts, are meaningless and worthless if the person does not have LOVE. This individual was sadly lacking in that department; therefore, according to the infallible and holy Word of God, whatever gifts she claimed to have didn’t mean a thing.
The Bible gives very clear examples of the fruits of a true Christian who lives by the Spirit as opposed to the behaviors of one who might claim to be Christian, but who really lives by the flesh or by her sinful nature. This is how we can tell the difference:
SO I SAY, LIVE BY THE SPIRIT, AND YOU WILL NOT GRATIFY THE DESIRES OF THE SINFUL NATURE. FOR THE SINFUL NATURE DESIRES WHAT IS CONTRARY TO THE SPIRIT, AND THE SPIRIT WHAT IS CONTRARY TO THE SINFUL NATURE. THEY ARE IN CONFLICT WITH EACH OTHER, SO THAT YOU DO NOT DO WHAT YOU WANT. BUT IF YOU ARE LED BY THE SPIRIT, YOU ARE NOT UNDER THE LAW.
THE ACTS OF THE SINFUL NATURE ARE OBVIOUS: SEXUAL IMMORALITY, IMPURITY AND DEBAUCHERY; IDOLATRY AND WITCHCRAFT; HATRED, DISCORD, JEALOUSY, FITS OF RAGE, SELFISH AMBITION, DISSENSIONS, FACTIONS, AND ENVY; DRUNKENESS, ORGIES AND THE LIKE. I WARN YOU, AS I DID BEFORE, THAT THOSE WHO LIVE LIKE THIS WILL NOT INHERIT THE KINGDOM OF GOD.
BUT THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT IS LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS AND SELF-CONTROL. AGAINST SUCH THINGS THERE IS NO LAW. THOSE WHO BELONG TO CHRIST JESUS HAVE CRUCIFIED THE SINFUL NATURE WITH ITS PASSIONS AND DESIRES. SINCE WE LIVE BY THE SPIRIT, LET US KEEP IN STEP WITH THE SPIRIT. LET US NOT BECOME CONCEITED, PROVOKING AND ENVYING EACH OTHER.
BROTHERS, IF SOMEONE IS CAUGHT IN A SIN, YOU WHO ARE SPIRITUAL SHOULD RESTORE HIM GENTLY. BUT WATCH YOURSELF, OR YOU MAY ALSO BE TEMPTED. CARRY EACH OTHER’S BURDENS, AND IN THIS WAY YOU WILL FULFILL THE LAW OF CHRIST. IF ANYONE THINKS HE IS SOMETHING WHEN HE IS NOTHING, HE DECEIVES HIMSELF. EACH ONE SHOULD TEST HIS OWN ACTIONS. THEN HE CAN TAKE PRIDE IN HIMSELF, WITHOUT COMPARING HIMSELF TO SOMEBODY ELSE, FOR EACH ONE SHOULD CARRY HIS OWN LOAD. ANYONE WHO RECEIVES INSTRUCTION IN THE WORD MUST SHARE ALL GOOD THINGS WITH HIS INSTRUCTOR. DO NOT BE DECEIVED: GOD CANNOT BE MOCKED. A MAN REAPS WHAT HE SOWS. THE ONE WHO SOWS TO PLEASE HIS SINFUL NATURE, FROM THAT NATURE WILL REAP DESTRUCTION; THE ONE WHO SOWS TO PLEASE THE SPIRIT, FROM THE SPIRIT WILL REAP ETERNAL LIFE….Galatians 5: 16-26- GALATIANS 6:1-8 NIV.
Thank you, Father God for your holy Word. Help us never to stand by silently while others defile your Word by perverting it to justify their wickedness. Bless us, Holy Spirit, with your priceless gifts of discernment, understanding, and wisdom. Lord Jesus, give us the courage to speak out against all evil, even if we have to rebuke a “brother Christian”, and to stand fast and bind Satan in all his clever disguises, in your glorious Name we pray. For greater is he that is in us than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4). Amen!
THE WISDOM OF PROVERBS
A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who pours out lies will perish…Proverbs 19:9
Why do you boast of evil, you mighty man? Why do you boast all day long, you who are a disgrace in the eyes of God? Your tongue plots destruction; it is like a sharpened razor, you who practice deceit. You love evil rather than good, falsehood rather than speaking the truth. Selah.
You love every harmful word, O you deceitful tongue! Surely God will bring you down to everlasting ruin: He will snatch you up and tear you from your tent; he will uproot you from the land of the living. Selah.
The righteous will see and fear; they will laugh at him, saying, “Here now is the man who did not make God his stronghold but trusted in his great wealth and grew strong by destroying others!” But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever.
I will praise you forever for what you have done; in your name I will hope, for your name is good. I will praise you in the presence of your saints.
Copyright 2002-2016.-All articles on this site are copyrighted. Permission to copy is granted for non-profit use only.Please help yourself to anything we write if you can use it to help others. A link back to this site is our only requirement. Please contact us for any commercial or other use. All e-mails, letters, and other correspondence become the property of Luke 17:3 Ministries, Inc. Due to the large volume of e-mails, we're sorry that we are unable to personally answer every one, but we do lift everyone who writes to us in prayer to the Lord.
The Lord specifically called Sister Renee to minister to Adult Children, not their parents, estranged siblings or friends, abusive or abused spouses, or victims of other types of abuse, although what we write here can often be meaningful for those folks as well. Because of this, our ministry and website have a narrow focus which we will not be changing. We simply can't cover everything. In addition, it is not our purpose to help you re-establish contact with someone who felt it was necessary to cut you off for the sake of their own well-being. We do not keep a list of resources for estranged parents or any other type of abuse and suggest if you are sincerely interested in making amends with an estranged relative, you do an internet search for a website or group that will be more relevant to you. If you cannot find a group or site that you can relate to, we suggest you start your own, and bless other people in your position as well as find support for your personal issues.
For Adult Children and others as well, please understand that we cannot give you personal advice concerning your particular family relationships. We are not therapists or lawyers, we usually do not have enough information to form an opinion, and time does not permit us to give enough thought to each person's individual situation to do it justice. If you need personal advice, we urge you to contact the appropriate professional, depending on the problem you have- your minister, therapist, attorney, police department, local domestic violence hotline, etc. In reading this site, you acknowledge that nothing you might read here qualifies as or substitutes for professional advice. Please note we cannot recommend or refer you to a counselor and we do not have a list of therapists or recovery groups in your area. The only Counselor we recommend is the Holy Ghost, and we encourage you to read the Bible and learn for yourself what the Lord says about the issues we write about.
Our articles are strictly our personal opinions and testimonies and are not intended to give or offer any advice. All who access this site do so with the understanding that we are NOT professional counselors and we strongly recommend that you discuss your individual situation with your pastor or therapist and pray for the Lord's guidance before acting on anything we write on this site. Unfortunately, the abuse we discuss is all too common, inflicted on countless victims by countless perpetrators. All names and identifying details in our articles have been changed to protect the innocent as well as the guilty. Any resemblance to a real person or persons whom you might know is strictly coincidental.