HOLIDAYS 2008 Newsletter

LUKE 17:3 Ministries
for adult daughters
of controlling or abusive birth-families

A sisterhood for those who seek support in developing self-esteem, setting boundaries and limits, forgiveness, Godly confrontation, recognizing and cutting ties with reprobates, healing, and rejoicing in the peace and love of

 the Lord, our Father

take heed to yourselves. If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him……..Luke 17:3


VOLUME 6, ISSUE 4                                                                                                                           HOLIDAYS 2008


Luke 17: 3 is the scripture often misquoted, usually by an abuser or his enabler, when he tells you that the Bible says “Forgive and Forget”, or that you must forgive him because you are a Christian. However, Jesus is very specific when he tells us to rebuke the sinner, and if he repents, to forgive him. Have you rebuked your abuser, and has he or she repented?


If you have ever experienced Adult Child Abuse by a parent, sibling, or other relative, We Welcome You!

Our newsletter is sent to you free-of-charge, as the Lord continually provides. Do you know someone who would like to be on our mailing list? 

If so, please contact:

Rev. Renee Pittelli

Luke 17:3 Ministries, Inc.

P.O. Box 684

Chestertown, NY 12817

or E-mail us at:



Please ask about our Luke 17:3 Ministry in Tennessee, founded by Rev. Denise Rossignol.


Insanity is when you do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result”……Albert Einstein


                The Christmas Holidays and Thanksgiving are a time peace, joy, and thankfulness.  We thank God for all our blessings and rejoice over the birth of our Savior Jesus.                   

            We all expect a certain amount of stress and fatigue during the holidays.  Shopping, cleaning, decorating, and cooking can take a lot out of us.  And after all the work and rushing around is done, most folks can look forward to being rewarded with an enjoyable time surrounded by their loving family.  

                But for some of us, these holidays, as well as others (especially Mother’s Day) are a time of extreme stress, anxiety, upset, depression, and exhaustion.  We do not have an enjoyable time with family to look forward to.  Instead, we dread the coming aggravation from controlling, ill-tempered, selfish, jealous, or abusive relatives.   Continued on page 2…..


You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you will give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end….Luke 1:31-33NIV

Whatever work you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving…Colossians 3: 23-24 NIV.

I will search for the lost and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured and strengthen the weak, but the sleek and the strong I will destroy. I will shepherd the flock with justice….Ezekiel 34:16NIV

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours….Mark 11:24 NIV

HAPPIER HOLIDAYS- continued from page 1…..

            We end up being disappointed, disillusioned, and saddened that every holiday has to be ruined by family members who should be expressing their love and gratitude instead.  We feel doomed to never having a nice holiday.

            And yet we do it again the next time. We keep doing the same things, over and over again, hoping that this time, maybe it will be different, but it never is.  We think we’re doing everything right, but we must be doing something wrong!  Guess who needs to make some changes here?  (If you said your abusive relative, you’re wrong- and you know that’s not going to happen anyway!)                                   Sister, are you ready to make some changes?  Are you ready to have the happy holidays you always wanted?  Are you ready to change your definition of a ‘family holiday’?  Are you ready to experience the kind of holiday you and your husband and children deserve?                                Please read the articles in the Happier Holidays section of our website. We pray that our testimonies as well as the articles in this newsletter will help you claim the peace and joy of the holidays, in Jesus’ name.  God bless you and pour out his love, and the love of family and friends upon you during every holiday!            In His love,

Sister Renee and Sister Denise

Glory to God!

The Wisdom Of Proverbs

There is hope only for the living. For as they say, “It is better to be a live dog than a dead lion!”…..Ecclesiastes 9: 4 NLT


Part II
By Sister Renee Pittelli

                Although in most families there are one or two, or even several, “problem” relatives, not everyone can be considered reprobate. In my own family, on both mine and my husband’s side, there are a number of “difficult” people, dishonest people, hurtful people, even people who have stabbed us or others in the back. Yet, in my entire life, although I have heard numerous heartbreaking stories about damage done by reprobate family-members, I have personally known only four people who have a true reprobate mind- my birth-father, my husband’s birth-sister and her husband, and one ex-friend. 

                From my own personal experience, I have observed the disintegration of the souls of the reprobates I personally knew over the course of decades. When you have been around a nasty, manipulative, or selfish relative all your life, you almost get used to the way they are. You, unconsciously or deliberately, develop strategies to cope with their hurtfulness and overlook a lot of bad behavior in the interest of “getting along”. You learn to put up with a lot.

                For years, the reprobate will either maintain a stable level of hurtfulness, or will slowly get more and more selfish, uncaring, and destructive to others. 

                He will become more critical, resentful, and bitter toward others and life in general. This resentment and bitterness is what he will use to justify hurting others. He will block any feelings of guilt for what he does by telling himself, and everyone else, that his victim “deserved it”. He will start doing things like rationalizing stealing money from someone because, in his mind, he feels that he has always “gotten the short end of the stick” and he deserves to make up for it. The fact that this will be at someone else’s expense is of no importance to him. See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled; that there be no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. For you know that even afterwards, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought for it with tears…Hebrews 12:15-17 NASB

                You don’t realize that your relative is getting worse and worse, so you keep adapting. His evil sort of creeps up on you without you noticing.       

       And then one day, out of the blue, he does something so outrageous, so incredible, so hugely destructive, that it takes your breath away. Suddenly, the veil drops and your eyes are opened. At this point, his pride is telling him that he is invincible, and that he can literally get away with murder.   He believes that he has the right to do anything he wants, and no one has the right to say anything or to stop him. The betrayal, the cunning, the treachery, the denials, the hatefulness and complete lack of love or caring about anyone else is staggering. You feel as though you are looking at a complete stranger- seeing him for the first time. 

                Whether this eye-opening incident was directed at you or at some other innocent victim, you are devastated to realize that someone you love could be so evil. You wonder how you could even be related to him.

                You are shocked into seeing him as he really is- having a wicked, reprobate mind. He may not have always been this way, but he is now. And he probably has been for a very long time, but you just didn’t see how bad he really was.

                That is how the revelation usually hits you. Although he may have been reprobate for years but you just didn’t get it, there is usually one last-straw event that opens your eyes. Before this, you really didn’t have an understanding of the evil you were dealing with. After this, you will look back on so many other incidents and see what you weren’t able to see in the past. Taken all together, these incidents show the pattern that you will now be able to absorb and see in a new light. It has been there all along, but your hopes and wishes for a loving relationship blocked your discernment of the truth.

                From my own experience, as well as the testimonies of others, I have seen that this is usually the way the realization hits you that you are not dealing with a human spirit anymore, but with a demon-controlled, purely evil, lost soul.


                Here are truths concerning those of a reprobate mind:

                What can I do to help my reprobate relative?

                 ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

                How can I save my reprobate relative?


                How do I deal with my reprobate relative?


                What do I do?


                Having turned the reprobate over to his own sinfulness, the Lord does use him to teach us and to refine our faith. It is the only constructive, useful thing a reprobate is any good for:

                 I have made you a tester of metals, and my people the ore, that you may observe and test their ways….Jeremiah 6:27NIV.

                What if God, choosing to show his wrath and make his power known, bore with great patience the objects of his wrath- prepared for destruction? What if he did this to make the riches of his glory known to the objects of his mercy, whom he prepared in advance for glory- even us, whom he also called, not only from the Jews but also from the Gentiles?…Romans 9: 22-24NIV

                To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong….2 Corinthians 12: 7-10NIV.

                These truths are painful, but they are reality nonetheless. Having any dealings with a reprobate is extremely dangerous. We often delude ourselves into thinking that if we treat all people with kindness and love, they will respond in kind. In most cases this is true, but not when dealing with a reprobate. Reprobates do not respond to love and kindness, except to interpret it as vulnerability or weakness on your part and use it against you to dominate you. 

                In our pride, we must not think ourselves able to control or deal with that which the Lord himself will not. If the perfect love of our Father cannot soften the reprobate’s heart, then wasting our love on him is meaningless. If the Holy Spirit cannot turn the reprobate’s heart to God, nothing we are capable of doing will have any effect. If the Blood of Jesus cannot save a reprobate, we surely cannot.

                This is because we are not dealing with a human spirit anymore, but with demons. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places….Ephesians 6:12KJV. A reprobate is a demonic person, who has given Satan complete control over his will. His mind, his heart, and his soul belong to the devil, and the devil is not going to let him go.

                A discussion of the reprobate mind would not be complete without a few words about Spiritual Warfare and deliverance. There is much written about Spiritual Warfare and deliverance by experienced deliverance ministers. I have not been called to teach about deliverance, and I would never recommend a lay person becoming involved with it as that would truly be playing with fire. Only if you have studied this subject intensely, know your Scriptures inside out, have a deliverance team to help you, and have participated in deliverances in the past, and if the demonic person wants a deliverance and will acknowledge Jesus and accept the Holy Spirit afterwards- then maybe, you might attempt to cast out the demons. This is not an undertaking for amateurs, and it is out of the question for most of us.

                We must leave the reprobate to wallow in his own evil, just as God has done. The only thing left for us to do is go into “damage control” mode. We now have an understanding of the reprobate’s true nature, and knowledge is power. We know that saving her soul is hopeless. The only thing left to do is save ourselves, and save our children. This means cutting off all contact with the reprobate and never allowing her to contaminate your life again (2 Timothy 3:5).   You can control whom your children see, so now is the time to do it. Do not allow her to taint your children, your family, and your life with her evil. Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you…..Matthew 7: 6KJV.

                Even if she comes to you, claiming to have changed and repented, do not believe her and do not trust her. This is the devil speaking. If you have ever seen “The Exorcist”, think of all the tricks and wiles Satan used to make the priest feel guilty and to deceive him, including taking on the persona of the priest’s own sweet, pitiful, innocent mother.   A true reprobate will never change, and wishing will not make it so. Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard its spots? Neither can you do good who are accustomed to doing evil…Jeremiah 13: 23NIV . If you have any doubts, insist on the test of time- observe her at arm’s length, without allowing her to insinuate her way back into your family or your life, for a very long period of time- at least a year or two, and see for yourself if she has truly had a change of heart- but don’t count on it. 

                Regarding other adult family members, you can try to protect them and enlighten them with your knowledge of the reprobate mind, but you cannot control them- if they want to continue having a relationship with a demonic person, ultimately, that is their choice. There’s really not much you can do about it, except pray for them. 

                The one positive action which certainly can’t hurt is prayer. This does not require exposing yourself directly to the reprobate’s evil. Since someone with a reprobate mind is FOREORDAINED to damnation, it is not likely that the Lord is going to take away the reprobate’s free will to choose sin because of our prayers. If, in our hearts, we hold out hope that our wicked relative will turn from his sinful ways, how much greater is our loving Father’s desire for such a turn of events? Unfortunately, the reprobate is not merely a “prodigal son” who can easily return to God, but a full-fledged, demon-controlled, servant of Satan.   As we are God’s children, he is Satan’s child. It is not in our power to choose righteousness for a demonic person, and the Lord will not take away his free will. 

                More importantly, pray for yourself and others who will be affected by the reprobate’s wickedness. Pray for courage, strength, and wisdom. Pray for discernment and knowledge and the counsel and comfort of the Holy Ghost. Cover those who will come into contact with the evil one with the Blood of Jesus and pray for them to be protected.

                The destruction and calamities that are going to befall the reprobate as a result of her choices, both in this life and the next, will be disastrous, overwhelming, and sudden. This is one reason why we need to get out of the way fast- to protect ourselves and our children before the consequences of her evil overtake our reprobate relative. My feeling is that I really don’t want to be caught in whatever disaster is about to happen and it’s much better for me to be out of the picture at that point:

                 But since you rejected me when I called and no one gave heed when I stretched out my hand, since you ignored all my advice and would not accept my rebuke, I in turn will laugh at your disaster; I will mock when calamity overtakes you- when calamity overtakes you like a storm, when disaster sweeps over you like a whirlwind, when distress and trouble overwhelm you. Then they will call to me but I will not answer; they will look for me but will not find me. Since they hated knowledge and did not choose to fear the Lord, since they would not accept my advice and spurned my rebuke, they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes….Proverbs 1:24-31NIV

                You cannot save a reprobate. The only thing you can do is save yourself.   And Jesus answered and said unto him, “Get thee behind me, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve”…Luke 4:8KJV. We need to literally put the demonic behind us and move on. If you have such a person in your family, our prayers are with you as you come to terms with your sorrow at losing a relative to Satan. May you rebuild your life with God’s loving grace, forever leaving behind the evil one, and find love, peace and acceptance with your sisters and brothers in Christ.

                In Ephesians 6, we are taught to put on the full armor of God when battling demonic forces. We must stand up for the truth. We must be strong in our faith, spirit-filled, and devoted to God’s word. We must lead righteous lives and pray about everything. This Scripture is an important basis for Spiritual Warfare and is how we will ultimately win the battle against Satan’s schemes:

                 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore, put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything , to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints….Ephesians 6: 10-18NIV.


Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith. But they shall proceed no further, for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as theirs also was….2 Timothy 3: 8-9KJV.


He replied, “The knowledge of the secrets of the kingdom of heaven has been given to you, but not to them. Whoever has will be given more, and he will have an abundance.  Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him. This is why I speak to them in parables: ‘Though seeing, they do not see; though hearing, they do not hear or understand.’ In them is fulfilled the prophecy of Isaiah: ‘You will be ever hearing but never understanding; you will be ever seeing but never perceiving. For this people’s heart has become calloused; they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts, and turn, and I would heal them’ But blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.” …..Matthew 13: 11-16NIV


He said, “Go and tell this people: ‘Be ever hearing, but never understanding; be ever seeing, but never perceiving.’ Make the heart of this people calloused; make their ears dull and close their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts, and turn and be healed”…Isaiah 6: 9-10NIV


What then? What Israel sought so earnestly it did not obtain, but the elect did. The others were hardened, as it is written: “God gave them a spirit of stupor, eyes so that they could not see and ears so that they could not hear, to this very day.” And David says: “ May their table become a snare and a trap, a stumbling block and a retribution for them. May their eyes be darkened so they cannot see, and their backs be bent forever”…Romans 11: 7-10NIV


And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient….Romans 1:28KJV


They are a nation without sense, there is no discernment in them. If only they were wise and would understand this and discern what their end will be! How could one man chase a thousand or two put ten thousand to flight, unless their Rock had sold them, unless the Lord had given them up? For their rock is not like our Rock, as even our enemies concede. Their vine comes from the vine of Sodom and from the fields of Gomorrah. Their grapes are filled with poison, and their clusters with bitterness. Their wine is the venom of serpents, the deadly poison of cobras. Have I not kept this in reserve and sealed it in my vaults? It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them….Deuteronomy 32: 28-35NIV


Reprobate silver shall men call them, because the Lord hath rejected them…Jeremiah 6: 30KJV


Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get thee behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men”…Matthew 16: 23NIV.


Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates? But I trust that ye shall know that we are not reprobates….2 Corinthians 13: 5-6KJV.


For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves…..Colossians 1:13NIV.

Reading Spotlight

     The Book of Luke tells the entire story of Jesus’ life, from before his birth to his death, resurrection, and ascension into heaven.  It was reviewed in our Holidays 2003 Newsletter as a beautiful and appropriate reading for the holiday season.

     Luke begins telling the story of Jesus with the birth and ministry of John the Baptist, continues with the Angel Gabriel telling Mary that she would give birth to our Savior, tells us some details about Jesus’ childhood, teaches us about his ministry, and ends with his death, resurrection, and ascension into heaven. 

                 In the Book of Luke, Jesus patiently teaches us, illustrating many of his teachings with parables, such as The Good Samaritan, The Rich Fool, and The Prodigal Son.  Luke tells us of the calling of the first disciples, and of the miracles that Jesus performed. 

     Jesus teaches us how to pray, by giving us the Lord’s prayer as a model.  He tells us details about the End Times, the Tribulation, Armageddon, and His Second Coming.  Jesus also refers to himself as our brother.  He warns us that our parents and siblings will turn against us and explains some of the reasons for this.

     Then the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people.  For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.  And this will be the sign to you:  You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.’  And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of heavenly host praising God and saying:  ‘Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!’…….Luke 2:10-14 NKJV

     Judge not, and you shall not be judged.  Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned.  Forgive, and you will be forgiven.  Give and it will be given to you: a good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom.  For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you….Luke 6:37-38 NKJV

     And he said,’ To you it has been given to know the mysteries of the kingdom of God, but to the rest it is given in parables, that ‘Seeing they may not see, And hearing they may not understand.”…..Luke 8:10 NKJV

     Now Jesus’s mother and brothers came to see him, but they were not able to get near him because of the crowd.  Someone told him, ‘Your mother and brothers are standing outside wanting to see you.’  He replied,’ My mother and brothers are those who hear God’s word and put it into practice.’….Luke 8:19-21 NIV

     No one knows who the Son is except the Father, and no one knows who the Father is except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him……Luke 10:22NIV

     So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened…..Luke 11:9-10 NKJV

     I tell you, whoever acknowledges me before men, the Son of Man will also acknowledge him before the angels of God….Luke 12:8NIV

   Then He said to His disciples, ‘  Therefore, I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on….Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouse nor barn; and God feeds them.  Of how much more value are you than the birds?….Luke 12:22 & 24 NKJV

     From now on, there will be five in one family divided against each other, three against two and two against three.  They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law…..Luke 12:52-53 NIV

     Whoever tries to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it….Luke 17:33NIV

     So He said to them,’  Assuredly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or parents or brothers or wife or children, for the sake of the kingdom of God, who shall not receive many times more in this present time, and in the age to come eternal life….Luke 18:29-30 NKJV

     When you hear of wars and revolutions, do not be frightened.  These things must happen first, but the end will not come right away….Luke 21:9  NIV

     But make up your mind not to worry beforehand how you will defend yourselves.  For I will give you words and wisdom that none of your adversaries will be able to resist or contradict.  You will be betrayed even by parents, brothers, relatives and friends, and they will put some of you to death.  All men will hate you because of me.  But not a hair of your head will perish.  By standing firm you will gain life……Luke 21:14-19 NIV

     This is what I told you when I was still with you: Everything must be fulfilled that was written about me in the Law of Moses, the Prophets, and the Psalms….Luke 24:44 NIV

     In the Book of Luke, Jesus explains to us what we must do to follow him and to secure our salvation. During the Christmas season especially, as we rejoice over the birth of our Savior, we must remember what his ultimate purpose in being born was. 

      He willingly came to teach us the Word of God, and then to sacrifice himself on the cross for our sins, so that we might enter the Kingdom of Heaven and live forever in God’s holy presence.  Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends….John 15:13 NIV.   Hallelujah! How great is our God! 

Thank You, Jesus, for coming to save us by your precious blood! Thank you Father for sending your son, that we may spend eternity with you in heaven!